The Long Good-Bye

Lately I've been ruminating on our impending departure from Okinawa. Last night I said a tearful good-bye to one of the best friends I've ever made, surrounded by 2 other best friends and thier families. It started me thinking about my life and the moves I've made, the changes, the friends, family, homes and places I've left behind. I guess I started the good-byes when I was around 6. They stopped for a while when my family settled in La Plata, but started again when I reached the ripe old age of 18. Thanks in part to the Marine Corps and in another part to my indecision, I (and we) have moved so many times in the last 17 years that I have lost count. When we left DC, we were immensely proud to have lived in our home there for 18 months. THAT IS SO SAD. When we leave Okinawa, it will be just 4 weeks shy of THREE years in one home. Not so long ago, thinking about our next move, I asked Susan (my Mom-in-law) what it was like to have lived one place her entire life. She summed it up in one word. Nice.

Nice. I think it would be nice to live one place, nice to make friendships that I don't have to bid farewell, nice to shop at the same grocery store forEVER, nice to pump my gas at the same corner station, nice to see my children grow up WITH thier friends. Watching those girls (and Alex & Nate) play last night was heartwarming and heartbreaking all at the same time. Hugging my dear friend Good-Bye as I sobbed sucked. And I'll do it again soon. BUT.

I still talk to Angi as much as I can, post silly comments regularly on her blog & send kid art through the mail. Cassie & I still manage to be joined at the phone despite the fact that we live 1/2 a world apart. Debbi still sends cards for every holiday and never forgets my birthday. Tami, Annie & I already have a vacation together planned for July and if it kills me I will somehow manage to get Jodi there. Connie & I still see each other EVERY Christmas and never forget to wish each other Happy Birthday on the Marine Corps Birthday. Michelle keeps me laughing & learning from her blog and comments and is STILL so dearly missed here. Stacey & Jen always clear their schedules when I go home to Texas and make me feel like I never left and remind me how loved and missed I am there. (You still give me crap for leaving and I love you both for it!) Heidi has just left but already sent me a sweet email that reminds me of why we she was, and still is, such a great friend. Paige & Mary might not be by blood sisters, but they are my sisters in spirit and always make me feel loved, missed and a part of life when I'm in Maryland.

And then there are my families. Always calling, sending cute stuff, flying us home, sending funny emails, just being there. They remind us every day that we are loved, missed and that our return to the U.S. is eagerly anticipated.

SO. I hate moving, I hate saying Good-bye. I hate packing, unpacking, and hooking up new utilities. I hate never getting to talk to my brother. I hate having a rift with my oldest, best friend that is too far away to solve.

BUT. If I never moved, never went new places and never experienced the world as I have, I would never have met all of you. All of you, you who make my life full, sweet, rich, beautiful, amazing. I wouldn't trade one moment of my transient life if it meant I might not have met even one of you.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Until just this moment, I thought of my life as The Long Good-bye. But it's not that at all. It's until we meet again. And we will.

I love you all.

Tiff

All grown up

Little Evie before...

















Eva has been asking for quite some time to have hair "up to her chin." Over Christmas she asked, but Daddy said no. Well, since she has asked several times and understands that we won't be able to have braids, we finally gave in. Knowing this was a big deal, I elected to take her alone AND take pictures. Oh, I almost cried when she took that first big cut! It was hard enough to see my baby with a grown up do, but my sister didn't get to help her take that big step! I miss you AND your scissors, Sis. So, without further adieu...






Grown up Evie Grace, after...












































































Breaking Daddy's heart, one lock at a time!

And as a P.S., here is my other grown up girl, with TWO ponytails!

On the Mend

Today I woke up and was actually breathing through my nose. For those of you scratching your heads right now and wondering why this is significant, allow me to elaborate. Last Thursday, March 8, I had a septoplasty to fix my deviated septum. Surgery went well and I woke to find that my doctor had removed what he stated to be the largest bone spur ever from my nose, along with straightening and shaving my septum. Lovely. Leave it to me to be the freak. Anyway, my recovery started off semi okay, but took a nose dive (literally) when I got sick with a cold/flu on top of my recovery. UGH. I developed a touch of viral pneumonia from this, so it's been a rough go. HOWEVER, today I am starting to feel normal again, with the exception of a VERY itchy nose/eyes and a yucky cough. I'm still tired, but I'm getting there! I have to give a big thanks to Tami, Jodi and Heidi for helping out with my kids! You ROCK! Also HUGE thanks to Jamie Oberman (ENT doc), Tim Ayers (Anethesia doc), APU staff and ENT Staff. Jamie swears I said nothing embarrasing under anesthesia. Whew.

On to other excitement! Here is Eva on her new big girl bike! I cannot believe my baby is ready to ride. One of my most vivid and cherished childhood memories is of my father teaching me to ride my very first two wheeler. I remember it in such vivid detail, him dressed in some silly overalls, squatted to the ground with his screwdriver, removing the training wheels from my beautiful big bike. Oddly, I can't seem to recall the color, maybe it was blue. Once the trainers were off, he turned to me with this big smile on his face, ready to help me shed my fears and feel the wind in my face. Surprisingly, I remember that we lived on Joanna Drive in Santa Anna, CA, on a tree lined street of duplex homes, many with children. We went to the end of the driveway and Dad set me on the bike, holding it steady so I could get my feet on the pedals and find my balance. We started slowly down the sidewalk, my dad holding the seat and starting to jog as we picked up speed. Without warning, he let go, watching me sail alone down the sidewalk, shouting with joy and maybe just a bit of sadness. I was growing up. It would be the first of many times my father helped me sail away. The training wheels still attached to Eva's bicycle, her father has yet to set her free. He will, as my father did. I wish for her that the memory lives in her mind as vividly as it lives it mine. Thanks, Dad.

Charley's giving a big wide hello to everyone!! We miss you! Check me out, Uncle Markie. My skull and bones onesie is my FAVE! We've graduated from commando crawling (only used for speed now) to hands and knees, albeit a bit more slowly. Table food is all the rage and we are awaiting the full arrival of THREE, count em 3, top teeth, bringing our arsenal of chewing mechanisms to FIVE!! Go Charley! We are also giving a bit of attention to standing with assistance. No pulling up yet, but it's not far off. Also, Charley is quite possibly the nosiest little nelly on the planet. I think I need to fill the drawers of my step tansu with little treasures to keep her busy! Love to all from the munchkin.

Finally, here is a pic of me and some of my girls at Tami's Thanks party. My sweet pal hosted a lovely party, thanking all of us for our friendship and time together here on our little island "paradise." (think beach huts and beautiful weather, HAHA) It's amazing and more than a little sad that our time here is at an end. I've made some of the most amazing friendships I could have ever imagined and been surrounded by love and surrogate families for a wonderful 3 years. It is with great sadness that we will be saying Good-bye to the Cooper Family in 2 short weeks. Last night was especially bittersweet for my Family, as we bade farewell to the Lopez Family, our fast first friends and neighbors here on Okinawa. Heidi and I were instant friends the moment we met and I will miss her & her wonderful family (Al, Corey & Isaiah) immensely. This is us at Heidi's birthday celebration. 21 again! LOL Thanks for your friendship, support and help these 3 years and GOOD LUCK in Beaufort! Sayonara, my friends.

Luv to all,

Tiffers

Munchkin on the Move!

A baby on the move creates the highest level of anxiety. There should be a red phone somewhere that has a direct link to a team of highly skilled babyproofers that you can pick up like the BATPHONE and recieve immediate assistance from these superheroes. As you can see, her royal chunkiness is on the move. Commando crawling everywhere, taste testing everything in sight (including the 75 year old who knows what metal kickplates under the doors,) following mommy, evie and daddy, investigating and generally wreaking havoc on the household McCawley. Holy moley, she is FAST, too! When she sees something her little hands (or mouth) must have, it's like the 100 meter commando crawl trials at baby olympics. And, trust me, she would TOTALLY win.

In addition to this baby nobel prize worthy accomplishment, we have graduated to small bites of table food (can you say heimlich manuever,) real baths in the tub, clapping hands and possibly, just maybe getting ready to say MAMA!! Oh & did I mention those adorable 2 lower front teeth?

Charley's personality certainly matches her baby kewpie doll looks. She has got to be the sweetest child out there. Happy even when teething, the only thing that sets her over the edge is too much time away from Mama or a little tumble that knocks her wind out. Boy, you would think the child had a limb removed without anesthetic when she falls over. NO doubt in my mind that she has the LOUDEST scream on the island of Okinawa. She can however, shut her fingers in the drawer of the step tonsu and she will only grunt in response to that indignity. Hm. Can you say DRAMA QUEEN?

Speaking of Drama Queens, my little love bug is certainly deeply entrenched in the drama that is year 4. That little cutie pie has discovered her inner diva. My search for patience has gone so far beyond counting to 10 that I have discovered a new number. Alert mathematicians everywhere. It seems that every task requires negotiation, every meal is DRAMA and asserting herself is #1 on the priority list. While I'm over the moon that she is learning independence and how to make good choices, I secretly long for the days when Mommy was the coolest person on earth and hugs/kisses were 1st on the list of to do's for the day. The angst of "my baby is growing up," has already set in and she is only FOUR. Crap, I am so in for it. Reserve my spot on the funny farm.

Me, I spend my days hoping that tomorrow I'll wake up with the secret to raising good kids. It seems like every day I come across a new and disturbing issue that I must wrestle with to figure out how to NOT damage my children. Lately, I am obsessed with fear over moving back to the US. It's not my fear of moving to a place bigger or less friendly (well, yes it is) but really it's my fear of how to raise them in an environment obsessed with THINGS. I spent a more than ample share of my life obsessed with THINGS and it has taken every ounce of my being to learn that life is about more than what we have or will have. How do I teach my children that when they are still small enough for it to make a true difference in how they view life? Don't get me wrong, I like stuff as much as the next person, but I've had to figure out which stuff is truly important and what is just CRAP. Still working on it, as a matter of fact. Do they have commercial free TV in the lower 48? Can I send my child to school without her coming home wanting every new gadget with a logo on it? Is there a bubble available for me to move into?

I'm putting it in writing. I WILL raise my children without commercialism. I don't really know how yet, but I will figure it out. And when I do? I will BRAG until I am blue in the face. Marketers everywhere, beware. I will NOT let you into the brains of my babies.

And that, folks, is all.

Off to a workout!

Luv,

Tiff

My "big" little Bro!

So, I went to the PX to buy a magazine. I never expected to be able to actually purchase said magazine in our paltry PX magazine aisle. IMAGINE my joy and surprise to find the magazine, Revolver, actually in stock and waiting there just for me to buy it. Why, you wonder, would I be so interested in this magazine. Well, let's see... BECAUSE MY LITTLE BROTHER IS IN IT!!!! I know he is reading this and cringing at me making a HUGE deal about this, but it's totally my right as the dorky older sister!!!!!
Although most of my friends aren't really into major heavy metal, if you happen to find it remotely interesting, check out the new devildriver record. My brother produced it!!!!! The mention in the magazine was for this work.
Okay, I'm done bragging now. YOU ROCK MARKIE MARKERTON!!

Be my Valentine...

Okay, I'm done whining about website issues and I can't resist posting a few pics of my sweet valentines and Eva's handmade valentines for her little friends at school.

Love to all and may your valentine love last all year long!

Thankful

Whenever I start feeling sorry for myself or lamenting my lot in life, I get reality checked. It might be something as simple as seeing someone who has no home sitting under an overpass on a piece of cardboard or as complex as a friend who is pregnant with her second child in a foreign country while her husband fights a war that seemingly has no end. This morning I cried as I read an email from a good friend who apologized for wearing her heart on her sleeve. What on earth should she apologize for? If more people wore their heart on their sleeve instead of some stupid logo or an overpriced purse, maybe she wouldn't feel self conscious about being emotional when she has everyone right to be emotional! Okay, no soapboxing, just some good old fashioned bragging about my kids!



Evie and Charley have started bathing together and it is so CUTE! Charley loves the water, splashing around like a fish, while Eva dumps water over her head to "clean" her. I think Charley is a transplanted fish. She LOVES the bath, the pool, the ocean, the rain. Dumping water over her head just makes her smile and splash more.

Samurai Baby preparing for mealtime! Self-feeding is definately high on the list of priorities for my chunky monkey. FINALLY, she holds her own bottle and loves to sit in her highchair and stuff herself full of puffs (or as evie calls them: floams), dried fruit and wagon wheels.

I would say something cute about this picture, but at this point, I am so SICK of messing with this stupid website that all I can say is HOW CUTE is MY KID.

Okay, now I'm just done, since I've been trying to mess with this post for 3 days. Check back later when I'm not ready to blow up the computer.

Love,
Tiff

I'm telling my inner Bree...

Ya'll think we're MCCAWLEYS?

Ooh, I'm NAKED!!!!!

Pour me another, Santa...

My reasons to watch the grass grow...

Papa Rocks! What's up with those whiskers?


to kiss my -ss. Bye Bye Bree. Maybe if I say it enough times, it will come true. The type A compulsion to organize, categorize, label, list, straighten, dust, wipe, sweep, mop, pile and repile, vacuum, etc........................... might, just maybe, GO AWAY. Or hell could freeze over and the dinosaurs would return to rule our planet. I wonder how many hours, days, weeks & YEARS I have spent doing all of the above, plus some? Has is made my life that much better? (It has been mighty clean and I can certainly find most of what I am looking for... UGH I digress.) I dare say, not. I discovered something that I find quite sad about my life. When presented with a child requesting my attention or presence, if I find that I have a task on my to-do list, I'll often say, "just give mommy a few minutes to... BLAH BLAH BLAH." Or "maybe a bit later, mommy really needs to... BLAH BLAH BLAH." Well, guess what? There is no later, dammit. My children are going to grow up and I'll have missed moments because I'm ORGANIZING? So what the hell will they say about me? Wow, she was such a great Mom because the floor was so clean and the cabinets were SO organized!
This AHA moment didn't really just happen overnight. I just started noticing that I was always too "busy" when Evie just wanted my undivided attention, for whatever reason. And as hard as I have tried in the past to be able to just push stuff aside, I couldn't make myself. Then I went home. I looked at my children, my nieces, my brother and sister, my parents, my friends & extended family. And I saw people who meant the world to me were getting older. One niece is a "tween," with all the requisite anxiety, my brother is really grown up and has his own life & career, another niece is so adult and levelheaded she makes me want to be a better person, and my own children are changing a bit more every day. Getting older isn't bad, it's just life. But if we live so hard for tomorrow that we forget today, what the hell is the point? I think I may have said this before, these words sound so familiar. Do you think I'll listen this time?
I played a game with Eva yesterday for her Kindermusik class. When we got there today, I asked her to tell Miss Jennifer about it. Imagine my delight when she described it in perfect detail, with excitement and pure joy. That was enough to make me listen.
I've gone to bed every night for at least 2 weeks with unpacked boxes, dust bunnies in my corners and piles in places everywhere. Guess what. I'm NOT DEAD or in a mental institution. (Stay tuned, that is a minute by minute status.) Is it easy for me? Not really. Do I like it? NO. Can I live with it? You bet.
Bree- you can kiss my ass. I'm going to bed with a MESSY house.
HA!
luv,
Tiff

I swear we haven't been eaten by dinosaurs...

or shopping malls. We are back! Despite the wonderful time with friends and family, we are so glad to be home on Okinawa, in our beds, bathrooms and with our toys. I was a little ambitious with my 5 week trip and have learned my lesson about living out of suitcases for longer than 3 weeks when I'm not PCSing. SOMEONE remind me of that next time I forget. It's kind of like childbirth, you forget the pain when it's over and you don't really remember until it hits you in the face. But, truthfully, it wasn't THAT painful! I got to spend TONS of quality time with my families, my wonderful friends, and got to eat LOTS of good food! It was so wonderful to be able to share Charley's christening with my immediate family & a few close friends. Fr. McGready gave a wonderful service (that will live forever in memory, not videotape since my sweet hubby forgot to check the charge on the battery :-[ ) We were also lucky enough to get to stop off in California to visit Cassie & co for a few days. I tell ya, this sure was a TRIP!!! Well, enough about that and on to the good stuff.
We are short here and have recieved official word that we are headed to Camp Pendleton, CA next. We're excited to be moving somewhere with NO humidity and tons of good produce! The big bonus is Cassie & her brood are there. We can't wait to actually get to have regular starbucks mornings (& evenings & weekends.) We're leaving mid-May and hope to have a smooth move and flight. HAHA.
Eva is overjoyed to home with her friends and back in school. She has been exploring the house and her toys like they are all new. That's the good thing about time away, it makes everything seem new and wonderful when you come home. She is cracking me up lately with her little speech idiosyncracies. She sounds like mini-me. When she starts to use the word Vapid to describe Barbie, I'll know my work here is done.
Charley is FAT! I love it. She had a big growth spurt before Christmas and is a BIG girl now. She also started sitting up on Jan 30 (her christening day), starting waving (on the plane ride over to the US,) scooched to get her binkie on Thursday, and unfortunately stopped giving away tons of kisses :-( I'm trying my darndest to get her to say MaMa, but to avail. Little Booger.
Well, I'm updated and promise to begin my weekly postings again, post haste.
I'm off to a Saturday filled with fun of STILL putting away travel crap. Ugh. If only I could just be messy and really not care. Dammit, sometimes being a neat, organized, type A freak stinks.
Luv,
Tiffers

Maybe not rerouted to Siberia, but Seattle is close...

For the love of Pete, I knew something would go funky on that bloody trip. Thanks oh so much Omega for telling us our flight was direct from Taipei to Houston, when in all actuality, it stopped in Seattle for us to deboard, clear immigration, GET OUR LUGGAGE, clear customs, trek through the airport with 4 carry-ons, 2 children, a laptop, a USELESS phil and ted's stroller and a 35 pound car seat. I say this with an enormous amount of venom: OMEGA SUCKS. Traveler's beware.
Okay, enough. We made it here and we are so happy to be home! It's wonderful to visit with our family and freinds, some of whom we haven't seen in 2 years or more. The girls are really adjusting well, better than expected and we are trying to take it easy and enjoy our vacation time. Eva had a fun sleepover with her cousin Reagan last night and is loving the play time with her all of her extended family.
Tempering my enthusiasm for seeing everyone is just a bit of sadness at how much all the kids have grown since our last visit. It's a bit stinky to realize they are all growing up so quickly and we only get to see itty bitty bits and pieces. I treasure this time here and hope that the kids will also. I've had some time with my close friends Jennifer and Stacey. I miss them so much and I'm so lucky they always make time for me, no matter what, whenever I just show up on the doorstep of Texas.
We're off to Maryland on Friday for a bit. My family is so excited that my sister can't sleep, my mom is rushing like a madwoman to get shopping done and she said my brother is over the roof to see us all! (And Dad is just along for the ride, smart guy!) A year is just too long to go without seeing my "big" little bro and my gruff old Dad. I miss ya, man.
Well, it's 2 pm and I have yet to shower, so off I go to get clean. We're dining out this evening, off to enjoy things we dream of in Okinawa.
To all my Oki pals, I miss you dearly! I hope your season is wonderful and filled with the joy of all things Christmas. I can't wait to see you all again. Don't forget, we're on our home stretch when Jodi & I return, so let's spend so much time together we are just plain SICK of each other when it's time to scatter to the four corners. I hope each of knows how much I love you and our friendships and community. Let's make the best of it in the new year.
Merry Christmas everyone.
Love,
Tiff & co.

babbling, barfing and murphy's law...

seems to be the running theme in the McCawley household lately. Poor Eva picked up a stomach bug and had a barfing incident yesterday. Poor baby, she was just so upset! Her little tum was hurting all afternoon and she was exhausted. Needless to say, a movie and resting on the couch was called for. It's 8 am and she is still asleep, on a SCOOBY day, so she must still be feeling a bit under the weather. Not only was the poor child sick yesterday, but we had to cancel a playdate with Maggie and turn down playtime with Isaiah. End of the world for a 4 year old!

Babbling, blowing raspberries, belly laughing and vigorous rolling are the theme of the day in Charley's world. That child is just so bloody cute I can't even stand it. As I type, she is blowing a raspberry, followed by yelling dadadada babababa, grinning at me, grinning at the couch and chewing on her finger. This morning she fussed when daddy left the room! I can see it happening already, I'm getting shoved under the rug again. So much for mama's girl. I can't wait for everyone to see her in just ONE WEEK!!!! I can't believe it's been 7 months already. She changes so much every week. Right now, she's getting pretty chubby and I just love those little fat rolls. I squeeze 'em to make her laugh! I'd do anything to make that child laugh. It's just the sweetest sound. She and Eva love playing together and Eva is just so patient and sweet. I wish I could videotape 24 hours a day so I wouldn't miss a moment.

Murphy's Law has apparently invaded my life, much to my chagrin. Lately it seems that anything that could go wrong DOES. And I seem to have lost the ability to even get irritated about it. I'd rather just roll over and play dead. At least I seem to have a sense of humor about it. Wonder if that will last through my root canal on Monday. I sure hope Murphy moves on to someone else before this trip home next week or my plane might end up rerouted to Siberia.

Well, gotta go work out.
Luv,
tiffers!

Sleepovers and Birthday Balls

Here's a few more pics. I'll post more and chat a bit later on today. Gotta get some breakfast, suck snot from Charley's nose, workout and plan the McCawley family day!

Evie and her buddy Isaiah having a birthday sleepover in the tent!

Okay, so here we go to Ball #2! Both were a blast for the first year ever! I swear it had seemed like the ball was just a boring excuse to dress up the last few years and finally we had a great time!

Happy Birthday to...

my Evie Grace, the Marine Corps and ME!
Whew, what a whirlwind in the last few weeks! We've had 2 birthday balls, my birthday, Eva's birthday, her birthday party, a very sick little Charley, Christmas Shopping and Turkey day. So please excuse my lack of posts! I'll upload a few pics today and more tomorrow.


Charles and I on our way to the first of 2 birthday balls. We had a blast, even though on of his marines told me I was the same age as his MOTHER. He almost had to push for that one. Needless to say, he bought a round of drinks, got "yelled" at by Charles and poked at by Me for the duration of the evening! Poor Kid.

A picture is worth a thousand words...

Sassy Cowpoke & her sweet sidekick, Flower!

A Flower Garden & a couple of goofy gardeners!

My Sweet little Flowers!

Sorry! No time for details, so the much anticipated pics will have to do. YES I MADE EVA'S COSTUME!! I was so impressed with myself I almost peed my pants. I was truly channeling my Nana. Enjoy!!
Love,
Tiff & co.

Roll over & give me a KISS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Even my bootie is covered in Halloween!

Seriously CUTEST kid in Universe

Check me out Papa, I've got your sideways smile!

Sweet Sisters!

Mommy & her Munchkins

Big hugs from the baby bug!

And so it goes. Life as a 5 month old is truly all about the simple pleasures in life. Eat, laugh, smile, play, poop, give kisses, snuggles and watch the world go by. I can't believe my Charley is 5 months old already. Where does the time really go? Babies are so amazing, truly the greatest gift is when we are given the privilege of witnessing a person in the making. It never ceases to melt my heart when she laughs, grins, and gives me a big, sloppy open mouthed kiss. I'm constantly amazed when she does something new or just masters a skill she's been trying for weeks. This morning she was clearly irritated about something, so I went in to give her a binkie & she'd rolled herself onto her belly & gotten kind of stuck there. It was too cute when I rolled her over & she just popped that binkie back in her mouth, stuck her hand by her ear & drifted back off to dreamland.
And... So a report on the Chronicles of Charley:

Rolling, rolling, rolling, keep that baby rolling!

Give me big sloppy kisses, I'm just that cute!

I can take my binkie out, I can put it back in, take it out, back in. AHA!

Cereal? Mmm Hmm. Love the stuff.

Fat rolls? Chunky Monkey, You want em, you got em!

Spinning the exersaucer while smacking every available toy? LOVE IT!

Eating my feet & removing my socks at every opportunity? YUPPERS.

Sitting? Not on your life. Still a gumby completely folded in half.

Holding my bottle? Are you kidding? That's what Mom is for.

Grabby Graberton. Can't keep my hands off anything that hangs, dangles or swings.

Mirror gazer. I am TRULY the cutest kid out there & I LOVE to look at myself & laugh, laugh, laugh.

Tickles? Holy Moses, I am super-dee-duper ticklish & I LOVE TO LAUGH!

Baby Babbles? Are you kidding? I think I have something important to say, so I just talk away!

How big am I? I weigh 13 lbs & I'm 25 1/4 inches long!

Cutest kid ever? YOU BET!!

Now for an Eva Update!
Oh, my sweet child. Well, let me clarify that. The last few days have been Mommy heaven with that girl. So cooperative, helpful & easy going I feel like I've won the lottery. I'm just waiting for the evil 4 year old to reappear & take away my lottery winnings. Seriously, I really thought I'd lost my sweet baby to the Freakin' Fours, when all of a sudden, she reappeared! I tell ya, Kristina always said it wasn't the Terrible twos or threes, but the F-ckin' Fours that did her in. I totally understand what she means! For a few days we'll roll along, happy as can be, minimal temper, happy cooperation & good listening. Then all of a sudden, the wind blows or something & it's temper tantrum city, deaf ears & "but Mom," all day! Oyivay, a window on the teen years. Okay, enough complaining. My little evie grace really is such a punkin, but she does have an occasional moment. Just like her daddy. Really, he REALLY does!!!! Don't you people out there call me a liar. I live with the man. Oh, all right all ready. I give up.

So. School for Eva. I was so excited for Evie to start back this year, as last year was a great year for her! She really blossomed socially & enjoyed each & every day of school. I was always happy with her work, with her activities & especially with her awesome teacher! I was really looking forward to another great year, especially since I felt like this year, she might be ready to come away from the experience with great pre-reading skills, as well as refine her fine motor & begin some writing, since she is totally ready! (okay, she is obsessed with letters, "writing," tracing, pretending to read & identifying familiar words.) Well, suffice it to say that I am looking for a new school. I have agonized over this for weeks. I'm so sad to take her away from her friends & the school she loves, but I truly feel that this year they are not holding up to their end of the bargain. There are 16 kids this year, vice 12 last year. Unfortunately, this is too many kids for just the teacher & 1 aid and alot of work is falling by the wayside in the name of crowd control and classroom management. I know that her "education" at this level is not going to make or break her in the years to come, but I do feel that she is ready to move forward in some areas & it's not possible for her to do due to the class environment. There is also a huge disparity between the 2 classrooms for 3 year olds. The other class accomplishes twice as much & has a much calmer atmosphere for the kids to work & play in. UGH. What do I do?

Okay, so the good stuff!
Evie is becoming more "little girl" every day. She has discovered her independence in a way I've not seen before. She TOTALLY broke my heart last week when she asked me to drop her off at Maggie's for her playdate instead of staying. I was DEVASTATED, yet amazed. When did she realize that she thinks it's cooler to play without Mommy around? Yet, sometimes she is so much more interested in actually playing with me! She loves to play games, play dolls, dance & sing with me more now than ever before. What an oxymoron. But, one that I love. I love that she is so secure in herself that she can totally function on her own. I also love that she thinks I'm fun & wants to hang out with me to play. I love that the other day she told me I was her best friend.

Her 4th birthday is impending & for the first time, she is really vocal about what she wants to do for a party. It's really fun to hear her ideas & try to find ways to make a cool party with them. She is set on a My Little Pony theme. YEAH!! She didn't once ask for a Barbie or Princess party, so I guess my redirection has worked a bit. I ROCK. Okay, no more potshots at those 2 for a while. She has stated that she would like to make hats, have a pinata & go swimming. I'm working on it. We might end up with a tea party fiesta swim adventure. I'll keep you all posted!

OH, the coolest thing the other day. In my car she found a little brochure with a map of the US in it. So she opens it up, asks me if it's a map of America & then starts pointing at states & asking me what state it is & then telling me or asking me who we know that lives there. What a nerd. I love it. I'm ordering the Land of Nod map of the US the second I am done with this post. OOHH, maybe we can learn all the capitals & state birds. HOLY CRAP, what has happened to me? Pretty soon I'll be wearing prairie dresses & not shaving my armpits.

Did I forget to mention I'm investigating some principles of simple living? STOP LAUGHING. I swear. It's a really cool movement to simplify our incredibly insane lives & I think they are really onto something. Who says we have spend today catching up to tomorrow? (thanks angie!) I'd rather live in the Now & enjoy it than spend today running & miss all the good stuff that happens when we slow down. I currently find myself a bit overscheduled & am about to bring it all to a screeching halt. When it takes me 5 days to return a phone call (sorry Cassie, sorry Markie!), I know too much crap is clogging the arteries of my life! Scale it back I say. Why do our kids need 3 or 4 extracurriculars? Do we do it because everyone else does? 1, maybe 2 is certainly enough in my book. My extracurriculars are getting the best of me right now, but I am working on getting a bit more organized (can you say TYPE A) so I can have more free time with my hubby, my girls and my pals! It's my last year here in 1950's America & I am damn skippy going to enjoy it.
SO, if you don't hear from me at least once a week by blog, send me an email, leave a comment or shoot me in the butt, but make me remember to slow down, live for now & keep this blog updated so I remember what is really important.
Life, Love, my Girls, Friends, Family.
luv to all,
I remain, respectfully...half a bubble off.
tiffers

Look Ma, no lines!

THIS is... Only 1 Me!!

Funny thing. I was sitting in my bed, sicker than snot, last Saturday. Into my room trots my little Eva, artwork in hand. Lately, she's taken to ransacking the "art" drawers for supplies & tools to create her little picassos. (I am so prejudiced..heehee) SO, the sight of her with art was not an unusual one. What was unusual, however, was the fact that she had produced (UNAIDED & unpressured) her very own self portrait, as well as portraits of Charles & I. I took one look at that adorable picture she drew of herself & knew that what I was seeing was her vision, her picture, herself! I thought alot about that last post, wondering if I was being too...I don't know, "free?" Too judgemental? NOT!!! I knew in my heart that she was capable of that, I just needed to really see it in living color. She's been making leaps and bounds all summer in her fine motor, dexterity, inventiveness & her "pretend" stories & friends. To see it all culminate was so cool! It just makes me more determined than ever than I will never let my children be boxed in by the expectations or desires of others. I know what's right for my girls.
Watch out Picasso, Casatt, Monet & Van Gogh...
Here comes EVA!
I really am so totally prejudiced!
luv,
tiffers

Being one of three...

is best for me. I remember quite vividly the day my Mom told me & Sam that we were going to have a little brother or sister. It was the icing on the cake of probably the best year of my life to that point. After some tough times for my family, my parents decided that they really were meant to be & embarked on a new journey together, remarrying on our vacation to Maryland. The following summer, we packed up the house, the dog, the cat, the construction supplies, the boat, the trucks & of course, us, and headed cross country for a fresh start in Maryland, my dad's childhood home. That trip TOTALLY sucked. We were all sick, the trucks overheated, got flats, the cat & dog jumped out while the truck was moving & to top it off, we never got to see the Grand Canyon or the World's Fair. We did, however, get to Maryland safe and sound, ready to jump into our new lives clear across the country from California. Talk about an adjustment. ANYWAY, I digress. We quickly settled into our new lives in East Coast suburbia, throwing a fun labor day party for our new friends & family. Well, Fr. Brault decided blessing my parents bed was in order that day. Hm. Wasn't but a month or so later my Mom broke the news to Sam & I about the impending arrival. To say we were excited would be an understatement. When my parents were separated, we never even entertained the idea of another sibling, we just wished for our family to be one again. When things smoothed out for us, Sam & I began bugging my parents in earnest for a little brother or sister. Both Mom & Dad told us the time had passed for adding to our family & that we were just perfect the way we were. Well, I guess the Man upstairs had other plans. Our neat little family of four morphed into a rambunctious five on July 20, 1983.
Things in the Lewis household would never be the same, to say the least. Sam & I finally had the brother we'd wished for, the whole family we'd prayed for, a pool & by the following year, my Nana with us all the time.
Mark changed all our lives with his. Even though we had a true generational gap from Markie to me, with Sam somewhere in between, we have always been & will remain a tight little sib family of 3. I am so incredibly blessed to have my sister and brother in my life. I can't imagine life without either of them. Which is why...
3 is the number for me. I want my girls to be one of 3. I can't imagine a more perfect number. I can't imagine better siblings. I certainly can't imagine life with just me & Sam. All was right in the planetary alignment for the Lewis children, the Wetherill children & maybe someday, for the McCawley children.
Wish me luck.

Coloring inside the lines...

squashes my punkin's exploration of what she thinks is art!! I've always had a bit of an issue with "pre-determined" art for kids. Yeah, those little craft thingys they make in school are cute, but it's not thier idea, thier interpretation. It's not THEM. Today, Evie came home with this cute little worksheet with an outline of a little girl. The title was "Only 1 Me." She was supposed to color it & fill it in with whatever she wanted. YES, she did an amazing job of coloring in the lines & used lots of fun colors & even made her hair blond, but I did wish that she had just drawn her very own self portrait. It's funny, though. I actually felt guilty for feeling that way & not just being bowled over by how great she was coloring inside the lines. I know you're all rolling your eyes and thinking I've gotten way too crunchy granola (except you, Angie :-), but I really do think that sometimes our society is so obsessed with labels, commercialism & keeping up with the "Joneses" because we've lost our ability to be "free" thinkers. We're born into a society that doesn't always value the whimsy & magic of our children. I believe that there are still way too many people out there who think children are meant to be controlled, told what to think & should be seen/not heard and that it has an enormously negative impact on both our children and ourselves. Don't get me wrong, I like nice things as much as the next person, but I've found over the last 2 years that not having what I thought was so important & that I could live somewhat "without" that it's really changed what I think is important. I no longer believe that money is the marker for success in life. My marker is my family, my children & my self-image. I get a much bigger reward at the end of day when I look at my children sleeping, peaceful- happy- healthy, and I know that they are that way because of Me, of Charles.
I haven't turned into "simple living" poster child. I haven't stopped buying things just because I like them. What I have done is learn I should want things because they make me happy, not because they show others what I have.
SO, how did I get to what I want/have/believe from "coloring inside the lines?" Simple. I want to live my life without conforming to societal norms just to fit in. I want my children to learn how to learn, NOT just learn to recite, regurgitate, pass the standardized test or color in the lines. I want to sing every day for the rest of my life, just because I finally love my voice. The way it sounds, the smile it brings to the faces of my children, my family, my students, my friends. I want to write for ME. I want to write for my children. I want to write for all of you. But most of all, I want to live each day like it's my last and regret nothing else. Because honestly, I have no regrets anymore. Each piece, part, event, has made me who I am today. And you know what? I like me, I really like me.
I really was so proud of Eva's coloring today. It means her fine motor is totally ROCKIN' and that she is beginning pre-writing. And that is awesome. Any new thing she accomplishes makes me smile & fills me with joy. BUT, I can still wish for better experiences for her & make it my mission to find them for her.
Hmm. I must be feeling introspective today. Ya think?
luv to you and miss you all!
Pay
IT
Forward,
tiffers

My perfect Mom day...

I know you're totally thinking I spent the day at the Spa, right.
NOT!! I think today was my best day ever in the chronicles of Mommyhood. I started this fabulous day with a workout. Totally made me feel like me again and not just a milk factory/cleaning lady/reservations clerk/teacher/playgroup guru/etc.................
When I picked Evie up from school, we just decided to come home, play games, hang out with Charley, bake & enjoy each other. And that is just what we did! I never once felt like I just had to go clean something, clean out a closet, make a phone call, deal with business crap, or anything else that is so NOT important in the grand scheme of life. It was so the best day ever!
I don't think I figured it out until today. Being a Mom really is TOTALLY fun if you let it be. No, I can't junk the routine of life, but I can decide to make it less of a priority to be so TYPE A that my picture is in the Mental Health guide next to OBSESSIVELY organized disorder. There will be crappy days, sad days, stressful days. But days like today just totally make me forget all about those days. Thank God for my children, my husband, my family, my friends, my life. I am truly blessed. Love to you all.
Don't forget to...
Pay it Forward...
luv,
tiff

Having a second baby is like...

The mohawk lives....

Hangin' with Sis

Who's that adorable baby in the mirror, Mom?

Hi, Ho, Hi, Ho, It's off to school I go!

Hangin' with Selah! See, I am a pygmy.

I will roll over, I will, I will!

Mmm, Mmm, Good!

falling off the face of the earth. Just Kidding! Seriously, sorry I've been lax about posting, it's been busy here with Kindermusik registration, pre-school starting & attempting to get Charley on some kind of predictable schedule. So, I've been absent a while, but I'M BACK!!
Where to begin?
Eva's Adventures...
back to school on Sept 8th. Oh, what a different first day than last year! My little wallflower has blossomed into the life of the party & just couldn't wait to get back to school. Last year, every morning was the "hand-off" from me to Kerri or Kim, usually followed by tears. This year was "See Ya!" followed by her reassuring her crying classmate that it's okay & it'll get better & he'll really like school soon! What a sweet child.
Eva brought home her schoolwork for the week on friday. I was so excited to see how much her fine motor skills have grown when I looked at her letter tracing & saw that she was spot on! Which brings me to my next dilemma. Education. When Eva was an early toddler, I started to look into Montessori Education. I'm really impressed by Montessori principles & really think the style of learning would benefit Eva's personality at this stage. I also firmly beleive that children will direct thier own learning if placed in the right environment to create curiosity. So here's the problem. The best montessori here requires full time attendance of 5 days/week, 6 hours a day. Evie is totally ready for that type of schedule, but guess who's the wuss? MOM! Although school has started, I'm still considering montessori. I know I can send her next year if we go to Parris Island, but I just don't want to miss this window of opportunity in her development. UGH. The perils of parenthood. Well, regardless of what I decide, my little punkin is growing up & I'll have to deal with it some day! So for now, we move onto:
Chronicles of Charley...
Holy Moses, what a sweet baby. I swear I've never seen a baby smile so much in my life. And at EVERYONE!! With that mohawk, those huge eyes & that super smile, she is breakin' hearts everywhere. The other day, we were out & about and she was hanging out in the sling. All you could see was her saucer shaped eyes & the top of her mohawk peeking out. I swear even 20 year old Marines were checking out that kid.
4 months old! We had a check-up, complete with those yucky shots. 24.5 inches long, 11 lbs 7 oz. I know, I know. I have little pygmy children. Hey, I'm small. It' s hysterical to see her next to all of my other pals who had babies at the same time. They all weigh like 16 or 17 lbs and here is my mini baby. She looks like a doll compared to NORMAL sized children. Speaking of looking like: I was moving pics around last night & found one of Evie at about this age with a towel covering her hair & only her face showing. Talk about creepy...it was totally Charley! How funny is that. Maybe they'll look like little clones with opposite coloring. Cute!
Charley decided to celebrate her 4 month birthday with rolling over. Right on the table at her check-up. I think it was a reaction to being set on her tummy. Which up until about a week ago, she hated. So the little bugger figured out how to roll over to avoid tummy time. STINKER. Finally, though, she likes tummy time, is pushing herself up, staring in the mirror and looking all around. So I guess I can stop inventing torticollis symptoms.
We also celebrated 4 months with some spoon fed cereal! Which she absolutely loved. Unfortately, I've 86'ed it since she started waking at 5 am again as soon as we added it to her diet in the evenings. Sleep beats cereal in the Mommy wars. We'll try again next month.
As for me & my honey...
Kindermusik started with a bang on Tuesday the 12th. My new space is awesome & my classes went great. I'm really excited to get back to teaching & enjoying the kids. Charley & Eva both loved thier classes & it was so fun to have my girls in classes. Wish me good karma all semester long.
Charles is submitting for DI duty this week, so we hope to know something by Christmas time. People in hell want ice water, so we'll see who wins. He has to spend the next 2 weeks as the Staff non fire for the range up North, so the LONG days will give us a taste of life in PI. Wish me sanity.
Our Christmas travel is booked, so a light is on the horizon. We can't wait to see everyone & be totally overwhelmed by all the choices! We are counting the days.
Well, I've reached my brain power limit for writing today, so hope you enjoyed the blurb. We miss everyone!
luv to all,
tiffers